Pornography Hijacks the Brain

This is not a fun subject, by any means. It’s certainly not one I want to blog about AT ALL… but enough is enough, already! It’s like a spreading epidemic —the excitement of pictures and living “images,” plus having sex with one’s hand, is being exchanged for making love with one’s wife. We’re hearing of it more and more every day. And I’m not being overly dramatic here.

Continually, we’re being emailed and comments are left on this web site (and others) where wives are crying out that their husbands are rejecting them sexually. Time and again, it’s discovered that these same husbands are spending time on the Internet, “privately” (of course, God sees it all) viewing pictures of naked women, watching live strip shows, and then satisfying themselves sexually, while their wives are left wanting and sometimes waiting in the bedroom.
I’m not talking about men who are rejected by their wives sexually. These are husbands, who have wives who want to make love to them but instead go into another room and satisfy themselves sexually. Some exchange naked pictures with other women, and somehow justify that there’s nothing wrong with this. Sometimes I want to scream in frustration, as I learn of this!
It’s SO sad and frustrating when you see a problem and you know the solution to a problem —the ones participating in this sin, need to STOP IT. (A humorous way of approaching it is found in: “Simple Advice We Sometimes Need.”)
In reality, this issue is anything but funny and easy. That’s why it’s spreading like an insidious virus of darkness —hijacking what is decent and good. Those who are tempted to do wrong, need to FLEE, as the Bible tells us in 2 Timothy 2:22. It IS possible. Others have done it. But it also is very difficult, which Mark Gungor talks about in the following YouTube video:
I’m not going to go into this issue too much further, because I think we have a lot of other information posted on this web site to help you. Paul Byerly’s article, “Sexual Attention Deficit Disorder” is one of them.
And then we have additional articles posted in the “Pornography and Cybersex” topic of this web site (make sure you read through the quotes, testimonies, AND the Featured Recommended Resources and Web site Links, as well, because there is a lot of help you can receive, if you take advantage of and apply the advice being offered).
But I want to leave you with a few quotes, hoping they will inspire you to dig deeper into the Quotes part of the Cybersex topic and the links and articles, for the help you may need.
The following are a few things you may not have realized:

• “Viewing sexual stimulation re-calibrates your sexual set point; i.e. once your mind forms a picture or has a new sexual experience, this becomes the norm. To get another thrill you need something even more exciting. This is how porn use can destroy your interest and attraction for your mate. Repeated pornography use numbs normal sexual drives and deadens your desire for a real person/partner.
“In addition, bizarre as it may seem, the more shame you feel about your guilty pleasures —the more you resent your partner! We don’t like people who remind us of our bad behavior. When you violate the lines of your own commitment and values you actually end up looking for faults in your partner to alleviate your guilt. ‘Well, if he/she were more (fill in the blank) I wouldn’t be doing this.’ And the guiltier you feel the more vulnerable you become to the escape of a sexual high.
“Millions of people are currently caught in the excitement cycle of porn use or an affair, either online or face to face. And if you think it will stop where it is, research proves you very, very wrong. Relationships which begin in cyberspace eventually meet face to face in some way, shape or form.” (Pat Love, from Yourtango.com article, “Is MySpace YourSpace?)
• Pornography is a parasite, because it steals your emotions, your focus, your time, your energy away from your spouse. I mean, it’s really demonic, if you want to get down to it. Pornography is trying to meet a legitimate need in an illegitimate way. When you go down that path, you are not fulfilling each other as God intends for husband and wife and vice-versa, and it starts to degrade your marriage. (Alex Kendrick, co-writer of movie, “Fireproof”)
• Pornography is dangerous because it rewires the brain to believe that what is sexy is anonymous sex, rather than the relationship. It makes sex physical, rather than about emotional intimacy. Soon it loses the ability to cause emotional intimacy, and emotional intimacy loses the ability to cause any sexual feelings. …It has been found that men who use internet pornography actually lose their sexual desire for their wives. (Sheila Wray Gregoire, from the Growthtrac.com article, “Talking About Sex”)
• A man who fills his mind with sexual images and thoughts commonly falls into a trap. Pornography can become a drug that men use to find quick relief from their daily frustrations. The temptation to lust after erotic pictures of models seems easier than taking the time to build a real relationship with a woman… (Rob Eagar, from the Growthtrac.com article, “Fooled by Fantasy”)
• Pornography grossly distorts a man’s view of the way normal women approach sex and sexuality… Counselors consistently report that when men indulge such a distorted view of women and their sexuality, they become dissatisfied with their own wives and sex lives, tend to evaluate potential spouses based chiefly on physical attractiveness, or bring impossible expectations for sex into marriage. All of the above lead to sin and heartbreak. (Beth Spraul from the Capitolhillbaptist.org article “You’ve Got Lies”)
• There are three things you need to know about pornography. (1) It’s addictive. Family counselor Gail Hoone said, “Pornography is more addictive than drugs, and thanks to the First Amendment, it’s getting bigger every day.” (2) It’s selfish. It trains you to see people as playthings to be played with, and all for one purpose —self-gratification. Intimacy, responsibility, and commitment are not even in the picture (or frame). (3) It’s shaming. Unlike the lepers in the Bible, pornography doesn’t ring a bell and cry, “Unclean! Unclean!”
Yet when you fall under its control, you find yourself responding to it in ways that leave you feeling cheapened and unclean. But there’s good news. Every leper who came to Jesus was cleansed; and through His blood you can be cleansed too! Furthermore, you can be empowered by His Spirit to cast down every imagination, and take every thought captive (2 Corinthians 10:5). (From the devotional, Word for You Today)
• “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)

To help you better, “flee from sexual immorality” and to help you better direct your life and your “brain” in a healthier direction, please consider getting help from the following ministry:

I hope all of this helps in some way. PLEASE get help, if you need it. The links to the web sites we recommend can even help wives, who need advice in what THEY can do.
May God bless you in your efforts.

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ —to the glory and praise of God.” (Philippians 1:9-11)

For Prayers/counseling, please call +2348033941952